Shall I highlight the ones I particularly like or confess the ones I consistently forget?
There is no ‘us and them’
People are just people
People do the best they can with what they’ve got
Coping skills develop slowly
Don’t expect your service user to perform perfectly. You don’t so why should they?
Don’t blame people with disorders for behaving like people with disorders
What people say may not be what people mean
Do as I do – model behaviours we want to encourage in others
Lapse and relapse – two different things
Sympathy is not usually helpful
Empathy can be over used
There is no failure but there are learning opportunities
Risk-free is impossible. Manageable risk is the way to go
The saviour fantasy
You’re probably not an emergency service – don’t try to behave like one
Hanged if you do & hanged if you don’t – a duty of care myth
The word ‘support’ is meaningless in and of itself
Seek first to understand
Nobody cares what we think so don’t moralise – give them evidence instead
Don’t recreate the ‘invalidating environment’
Everything we do teaches people about us and about the world
Challenging behaviour means….
Many behaviours ‘self extinguish’ if we let them
Everyone manipulates – even you
Beat past trauma with new, positive memories
Losing your temper doesn’t help
The clinician’s illusion
If you do the same things you get the same results
In every interaction think – ‘what do I want to achieve by this?’
Talk ‘one at a time’
“It’s just behavioural” – a workers’ excuse for lazy thinking about service users’ needs.
‘Attention-seeking’ is really ‘interaction need’
It’s not about us
Who put us in charge?
Don’t get on the pedestal – you’ll never be able to keep it clean
Any plan, however ill-conceived, is better than no plan at all
In the real world there are no excuses
Keep our promises